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VILINA CHRISTOPH

A Woman's Story of Healing & Empowerment

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  • Codependency as the origin of mommy guilt image
    Healing & Recovery

    How trauma and codependency in childhood can cause toxic mommy guilt

    I often question why I feel so much guilt as a mother towards my little boy. It’s not only crippling my own experience of being a mother but also sending inaccurate messages to my son which shape the way he views himself and the world. I feel stricken with guilt every time I feel the effects of my trauma. I blame myself for not being able to shake off the sadness or depression I feel, for the anger that sometimes I can’t hold or the negativity that my critical mind is keeping me a captive to. I feel shame every time I’m not at my best for letting my son down. When…

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    Moon Phases Image

    Working with the moon, its energy and phases

    19th March 2018
    Jonelle du Pont Interview Image

    Interview with Jonelle du Pont: blogger and writer at Tyranny of Pink

    26th July 2017
    Tanya Amidei Interview Image

    Interview with Tanya Amidei: Sexual abuse survivor, life coach and a spiritual writer

    28th June 2019
  • The shame around being a "bad mother" Image
    Healing & Recovery

    The shame around being a “bad mother”

    Sometimes I resent being a mother. That is not to say that I don’t love my child. Unlike my mother and some mothers who can’t love, I do love my son. With all my heart and soul, always and forever. I believe all mothers have moments when they resent motherhood. I believe that the contemporary expectation to be a non-stop happy and vibrant mother is not only unrealistic, it’s also severely shaming and stigmatising. It makes natural temporary feelings of dissatisfaction or unfulfillment fester into gnawing guilt. That makes me think how terribly unprepared and largely delusional so many mothers enter into motherhood, including me. I wanted my child with…

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    The death of the self image

    The death of the self: on toddler troubles, being human and name change

    4th November 2015
    Amie Johnson Interview Image

    Interview with Amie Johnson: Trauma survivor and a host of The HeART of Healing podcast

    22nd March 2019
    Your Feelings Are Valid Image

    You and your feelings are valid

    24th July 2017
  • Turn of Seasons and New Horizons Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Turning seasons and the possibility of new horizons

    Weather in Bulgaria has turned and it’s been really chilly for the last couple of days – we woke up to a 1°C/33°F morning in Sofia. It will be getting slightly warmer next week but, even so, autumn is upon us. I just flipped the calendar into October (although there’s a few more days) because I usually remember to do it when we’re well into the new month so I used this rare opportunity of remembering in advance. Doing this I flashbacked to when I first put the calendar up on the wall early in January. And here we are, just a few more days and we will be in…

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    To My Dear Child Image

    To my dear child

    4th September 2017
    Self Doubt Image

    Self-doubt: get out of your head and into your heart

    14th February 2018
    The Wonder List March Image

    The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of March

    4th March 2019
  • Healing & Recovery

    What I learned from my physical and mental instability episode

    (Long post alert) I’m just back from my holidays in Greece. We spent 11 days on the stunning islands in the Ionian sea on west coast of the country. I’d been prepping for this journey for months, organising diligently and planning fervently. I’ve waited passionately and eagerly until the day came. The complications started on the day before our trip. It appeared that our car’s documents were out of date and needed to be renewed. It was Saturday and we were supposed to leave the next day, Sunday. We decided not to risk passing the border with invalid documents so had to wait till the offices opened on Monday. That…

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    My dance with astrology image

    My dance with astrology: on anger, revolutionaries and colouring

    3rd December 2015
    Difficult Feelings Image

    How to work with difficult feelings

    20th March 2017
    Embracing minimalism image

    The beginning of a new journey: embracing minimalism

    28th January 2016
  • Setting Free From Past Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Setting ourselves free from the pain of the past

    I’ve spent a good deal of time digging up my past, exploring my psyche and searching for answers and truth. I found a lot of pain, sadness, hurt and sorrow. Not only that, of course, but I’ve been focused mainly on the difficult aspects since I wanted to heal them and release myself from the emotional prison I’ve lived in my whole life. For the first part of our life we don’t realise any of this, we simply act out these painful aspects of our past that were lodged into our subconscious. Sooner or later something happens to us to wake us up, become aware and heal the pain that’s…

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    Interview with Alexis Rose Image

    Interview with Alexis Rose: Author of Untangled, a story of resilience, courage, and triumph

    29th March 2017
    On the Brink of Dawn Image

    On the brink of dawn

    4th January 2018
    A Strange Day Image

    A strange day… in a beautiful and vulnerable way

    7th March 2017
  • Finding Your Authentic Blend Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Finding your authentic blend of expression

    Do you sometimes wonder who you are? I often catch myself thinking: “I want to know what my life purpose is!” Who am I? Why am I here? What am I here to do? I’m telling you it can quickly get very tiring and overwhelming. But still I wonder. You see, there’s this part of me that simply wishes to transcend the material. In other words, there’s this deep knowing that the material aspect of our life isn’t the full and whole picture. There’s so much more to our existence. And I just can’t put up with serving only to my material needs. Actually, I tent to ignore my physical…

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    The shame around being a "bad mother" Image

    The shame around being a “bad mother”

    2nd November 2018
    Showing Up For Ourselves Image

    Showing up for ourselves: an experience of a photo session

    30th June 2016
    How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma image

    How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma

    4th December 2019
  • Accepting Our Shadow Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Accepting our shadow as a way back to wholeness

    The key to joyful happy full life is the acceptance of all of yourself. It was C.G. Jung who first developed the concept of the “shadow” – we all have parts of ourselves that we would rather hide than show to ourselves or the world. These are those qualities we deem “unacceptable” due to many reasons – perhaps our parents told us that such and such people are bad, or to be this and this is wrong. Or it was our culture and community we grew up in that portrayed certain characteristics in a negative way. At a very early age, we learn to disassociate from these qualities in ourselves…

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    Love Is The End Image

    Pain is the means, love is the end

    31st July 2017
    A Message From the Goddess Isis Image

    A message from the goddess Isis

    8th November 2016
    Moon Phases Image

    Working with the moon, its energy and phases

    19th March 2018
  • Rise of the feminine post image
    Healing & Recovery

    The Rise of the Feminine and the next stage of my spiritual journey

    Hello beautiful people at the new Vilina Christoph site! You can read my earlier announcement here. You might’ve noticed that I haven’t posted for the last couple of months. Truth is that this next stage of my spiritual journey has been brewing and hatching. In particular, I moved my blog over from the cosy and automated world of WordPress.com to an independents host which gives me more freedom. The move was ripe since I’ve been planning it for months and just last week it was the right time for that change. Your experience as a reader won’t change but if you’ve been following my journey you will notice some conceptual changes at…

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    Jonelle du Pont Interview Image

    Interview with Jonelle du Pont: blogger and writer at Tyranny of Pink

    26th July 2017
    Trips and Insights From Around Bulgaria

    Trips and insights from around Bulgaria

    15th September 2016
    Moving Towards Joy Image

    Moving towards joy

    7th September 2017
  • Heal Yourself Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Heal yourself, heal the world

    Most of us know the popular quote: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” ~ Ghandi More and more we start realising that this really is the truth.  On my journey of healing, more and more I start to understand that by healing myself, I make a change in the world, and the world itself heals. Digging deeper and deeper in my own pain and trauma has led me to realise that I’m not only healing my personal wounds. In fact, my wounds are wounds that many of us share; they’re wounds that have been passed from generation to generation, throughout the history of humankind. These are…

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    Cutting Through Clouds and Fear Image

    Cutting through clouds and fear

    17th October 2016
    Working With The Inner Child Image2

    Working with the inner child: illuminations and release

    1st June 2017
    I am grateful image

    On gratitude

    20th December 2015
  • Self Doubt Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Self-doubt: get out of your head and into your heart

    I often find myself lost and wandering. I question choices, I search for direction, I grasp for guidance. Since I was a child I was never able to develop a healthy sense of self-worth and confidence. I battle with doubt every time I need to make a decision or take action. This could be mentally taxing and emotionally exhausting. The struggle to stay on top and in control of things is real and relentless. If I say or do something, I doubt whether it was the right thing or if I didn’t rush it. If I don’t say or do anything, I’m wondering whether I’m being too passive or too…

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    Being present image

    Being present: getting to know and love ourselves

    22nd December 2015
    Cutting Through Clouds and Fear Image

    Cutting through clouds and fear

    17th October 2016
    The Wonder List March Image

    The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of March

    4th March 2019
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Vilina Christoph Headshot Image

Hello & Welcome

I am Vilina Christoph and I write about my journey of healing and recovery from childhood trauma and emotional neglect. I use words to transmute the pain and adversity into fuel for growth and empowerment. I believe we have the power to heal ourselves and transform our lives from within. I am passionate about helping women heal, grow and build an abundant and authentic life .

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