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VILINA CHRISTOPH

A Woman's Story of Healing & Empowerment

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  • How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma image
    Healing & Recovery

    How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma

    For the last more than three months now I’ve been through a whirlwind of a storm. I’ve never thought that my son staring school will bring so much up. More and more I realise how isolated I’ve been and how much I’ve lost contact with the outside world. More accurately, I’ve suspected that but the clash of reentering seems to be taking me much more effort and costing me much more energy than I’ve ever imagined. I know there are many reasons for this – I am and always have been a very sensitive person and being away from work for 8 years now has put me in a very…

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    Four things I’ve learned from going through a crisis

    29th October 2015
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    Web Wonderland No.6 & what I’ve been up to: My hyper-active mind + books, tv, and useful links

    21st May 2017
    Finding Your Authentic Blend Image

    Finding your authentic blend of expression

    13th June 2018
  • Codependency as the origin of mommy guilt image
    Healing & Recovery

    How trauma and codependency in childhood can cause toxic mommy guilt

    I often question why I feel so much guilt as a mother towards my little boy. It’s not only crippling my own experience of being a mother but also sending inaccurate messages to my son which shape the way he views himself and the world. I feel stricken with guilt every time I feel the effects of my trauma. I blame myself for not being able to shake off the sadness or depression I feel, for the anger that sometimes I can’t hold or the negativity that my critical mind is keeping me a captive to. I feel shame every time I’m not at my best for letting my son down. When…

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    On the brink of dawn

    4th January 2018
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    Acceptance: the path to change

    5th February 2018
    How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma image

    How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma

    4th December 2019
  • The shame around being a "bad mother" Image
    Healing & Recovery

    The shame around being a “bad mother”

    Sometimes I resent being a mother. That is not to say that I don’t love my child. Unlike my mother and some mothers who can’t love, I do love my son. With all my heart and soul, always and forever. I believe all mothers have moments when they resent motherhood. I believe that the contemporary expectation to be a non-stop happy and vibrant mother is not only unrealistic, it’s also severely shaming and stigmatising. It makes natural temporary feelings of dissatisfaction or unfulfillment fester into gnawing guilt. That makes me think how terribly unprepared and largely delusional so many mothers enter into motherhood, including me. I wanted my child with…

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    How to work with difficult feelings

    20th March 2017
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    Being the gods that we are

    22nd April 2016
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    Working with the inner child: illuminations and release

    1st June 2017
  • Elizabeth Johnsen Interview Image
    The Empowered Women Series

    Interview with Elizabeth Johnsen: woman and mother on a path of healing and transformation

    In 2015 Elizabeth contacted me through my blog – she was the very first person to reach out in such a way. Quickly we felt a much deeper connection which grew into a friendship. Even though we’ve never met in person I feel we’ve known each other for lifetimes. I know Elizabeth has been through some hard times recently and it was painful to witness her journey “from afar” but nevertheless, I never stopped feeling for her. I’m happy to see and say that she has overcome the darkness. Here are Elizabeth’s own words: Tell us a little bit about your life journey. I was raised in New Zealand by…

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    Amie Johnson Interview Image

    Interview with Amie Johnson: Trauma survivor and a host of The HeART of Healing podcast

    22nd March 2019
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    Inner Child Therapy: Working with the father and mother roles

    12th April 2017
    Web Wonderland No.3 Image

    Web Wonderland No.3: New life coming to fruition, crazy eclipse season, and a special bind magic

    19th February 2017
  • Sacred Mothering Image
    Healing & Recovery

    Sacred Mothering: how to be a soulful mother on a spiritual path

    For a long time I’ve lived two separate lives – a life of an unfolding spiritual journey and purpose and a life as an everyday mother, partner and housewife. The first one happens mostly within me and I get to share it here with you, my readers and online friends, but I don’t express much outwardly in my day-to-day doings. The second life happens in the hours when I’m not working on myself or writing down my discoveries and realisations – it happens when I pick up my son from kindergarten and we spend the afternoons together outside or at home. Those two lives sometimes clash with each other and…

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    Acceptance: the path to change

    5th February 2018
    A Solo Adventure Image

    A solo adventure and a glance into a past life

    27th April 2017
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    The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of March

    4th March 2019
  • Motherhood Image
    Spirituality

    Motherhood and enjoying the present moment

    For a first time in my life I feel like I’m enjoying being a mother and my relationship with my son. I was too naive and maybe somewhat young when I became a mother. We’ve only been together with my partner for an year when I got pregnant. But we said yes to it, yes to all this family-making, children-raising thing. And it was good for a while. But soon it became clear that this isn’t what I thought it would be. It soon became clear that instead of building a family, there was a wall being built between me and everything around me. And I closed down and shut…

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    Identifying triggers and breaking free from the past

    2nd May 2017
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    Crisis as a call for change and how to integrate it in your life

    21st November 2015
    Working With The Inner Child Image2

    Working with the inner child: illuminations and release

    1st June 2017
  • To My Dear Child Image
    Spirituality

    To my dear child

    I thought I was coping with my reality until I realised that I was just trying to escape from it. The key to enjoying my life is to actually embrace it, as it is. I was running away from you, thinking you were the problem. When in fact, you are the one who will hold me through the problem. Regardless of everything else, I have the greatest gift of life  – you, my child. My son – my mirror, my reflection. All my pain projected onto you. I called you many things – all projections of what I’ve been hurting from in my life and relationships. My dear child, you’re…

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    Breaking free of our mental prisons

    9th June 2016
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    Taking the first steps

    6th February 2016
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    Using crystals to access the subconscious and heal deep wounds

    28th November 2017
  • The missing relationship with the mother image
    Healing & Recovery

    On grief: the missing relationship with the mother

    If you ask me how my life has been the last couple of years, I probably wouldn’t say it has been full of grief. It would be one of the first things to cross my mind but I wouldn’t say it. I would probably divert to being a mom and looking after a household, which is true but it’s only half of my world. The grief and everything it brings – I’ve put aside in the back pocket of my mind. It wasn’t until I started listening to the audiobook Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail by Cheryl Strayed, that I felt how much grief I still carry in me.…

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    On Femininity Image

    On femininity: breathwork exercise and a mother’s message

    11th May 2017
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    You deserve your love

    14th August 2017
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    The Rise of the Feminine and the next stage of my spiritual journey

    28th May 2018
  • Year 2015 what it brought image
    Healing & Recovery

    Year 2015: what it brought to my family and what it taught me

    I am going to talk to my son’s teacher tomorrow. My son, Sylvian, is nearly 3 years old and he is going to a Montessori preschool. I prefer to call it just “school” and the people taking care of him there – teachers.I want to talk to her, I will call her Jackie, and give her some background information. But let me give you some information about my son first. He started at this school in late September and he’s going 5 mornings a week for 3 hours. At the beginning he was thrilled to go there. It was a new place that’s not home and is full of toys…

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    Dreams of freedom and defining values

    25th September 2016
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    You deserve your love

    14th August 2017
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    The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of May

    6th May 2019
Vilina Christoph Headshot Image

Hello & Welcome

I am Vilina Christoph and I write about my journey of healing and recovery from childhood trauma and emotional neglect. I use words to transmute the pain and adversity into fuel for growth and empowerment. I believe we have the power to heal ourselves and transform our lives from within. I am passionate about helping women heal, grow and build an abundant and authentic life .

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  • Healing & Recovery
  • Spirituality
  • The Empowered Women Series
  • The Wonder List
  • Web Wonderland
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