Self-doubt: get out of your head and into your heart
I often find myself lost and wandering. I question choices, I search for direction, I grasp for guidance. Since I was a child I was never able to develop a healthy sense of self-worth and confidence. I battle with doubt every time I need to make a decision or take action. This could be mentally taxing and emotionally exhausting. The struggle to stay on top and in control of things is real and relentless. If I say or do something, I doubt whether it was the right thing or if I didn’t rush it. If I don’t say or do anything, I’m wondering whether I’m being too passive or too…
Acceptance: the path to change
“If you want to see change in your life, accept it as it is.” Lately, I find myself wanting yet another change in my life. I live in a city. About an year ago my family and I moved to Sofia, Bulgaria. It happens to be one of the most polluted capitals in Europe. I’ve started feeling the dust and the dirt of the city polluting my own life and state of mind. I find myself wanting to move again. I want to go far from the smog, the noise, the cruelty, and the trickery. Our family has suffered a few blows on our property, we’ve been stolen from, and…
Interview with Elizabeth Johnsen: woman and mother on a path of healing and transformation
In 2015 Elizabeth contacted me through my blog – she was the very first person to reach out in such a way. Quickly we felt a much deeper connection which grew into a friendship. Even though we’ve never met in person I feel we’ve known each other for lifetimes. I know Elizabeth has been through some hard times recently and it was painful to witness her journey “from afar” but nevertheless, I never stopped feeling for her. I’m happy to see and say that she has overcome the darkness. Here are Elizabeth’s own words: Tell us a little bit about your life journey. I was raised in New Zealand by…
A powerful start to a new year
Last week Thursday was 11/1 (or 1/11) of year 2018 – an 11 year. That is a great deal of Number 1 in a row – an unusual occurrence and a very powerful numerology! The symbolism of the Number 1 is one of new beginnings, creation, independence, uniqueness, motivation, striving forward and progress, ambition and will power, positivity and positiveness. Number 1 also resonates with the energies of pioneering, raw energy, force, activity, self-leadership and assertiveness, initiative, instinct and intuition. For many this is the true beginning of the year. If you are like me and for the first ten days or so you didn’t quite feel the full arrival of…
Waving goodbye to the past
I feel the last few years are catching up with me. Many feelings are coming up to the surface for first time to be illuminated. Things I realise for a first time ever. Things sometimes too grave. My life for the past 4 years has been grave in many ways. Not only, of course, but mostly. I realise now that as soon as my relationship with my partner began, it was stifled almost in the bud. Uninvited visitors, like death, grief, anxiety, came along and didn’t leave much of a space for us to breathe as a new family. My love for my partner was suffocated. My love for my…
On the brink of dawn
As we enter into 2018, I cannot quite get myself into thinking about resolutions, setting intentions or goals. I cannot even summon my mind to reflect back on the year 2017. I feel somewhere in between, not quite ready to let go of the old year and not quite there to welcome the new one. Perhaps this is natural, for some of us. Just as I try and think about what the past year has brought my way, I almost freeze. It’s been so much, there’s been so many lessons, too many experiences and feelings. I don’t know if I can summarise all of it in one post, one sentence,…
The anatomy of desire and manifesting
Two weeks ago I had an epiphany moment. It was a moment of full blown joy. I felt happy all the way through from the depths of my soul. It was a moment on my journey in which I felt I’ve passed some rite of passage and have shifted energies and moved forward on my path. It is an indescribable feeling and something I’ve never experienced before – it could probably be best described by the word BLISS. A couple of days later my dad came to visit and we shared a day of warmness and closeness. Then he had to go and even though we’ve said temporary “goodbyes” to…
Moving towards joy
Recently I’ve been feeling the need to move away from trauma and focus more on joy. And what that internal feeling symbolises is that my being is ready to shift from one vibration to another. I am aligning myself with the vibration of joy. Until now, even if I’ve wanted more joy in my life and tried to attain it, I wasn’t aligned with it vibrationally since I was anchored in a lot of pain. For the last two years I’ve been actively soul-searching and self-querying. This month is full two years since I came back to writing after a long pause. Since then I’ve done major inner excavation work.…
Coming full circle
Last time I mentioned I couldn’t wait for my holidays away from the city and all that has been happening for the last few months. Now, it’s been two weeks into August and I’m just starting to feel some sort of relief and relaxation. It was somewhat hectic and messy so far actually. My son and I are currently staying in my granny’s house where we spent our winter with my partner just after we moved from Ireland to Bulgaria and before we moved to the capital. My father was also here but left today and the house has quietened down a bit, hence being able to write. My son…
The power is within you
Last month was an emotional rollercoaster. And I know I say that more often than not. But I won’t be able to describe it any other way. Now, I have learned that what really matters is how you respond to the adversity, what you do with your feelings, what you make out of your experiences. It’s probably true that life is just going to keep throwing sour lemons or rotten tomatoes or whatever at us. But what counts is how we take that and what we make of it. “Are you going to drink the lemon juice or are you going to make some lemonade?” You see, the power is…
