I’ve spent a good deal of time digging up my past, exploring my psyche and searching for answers and truth. I found a lot of pain, sadness, hurt and sorrow. Not only that, of course, but I’ve been focused mainly on the difficult aspects since I wanted to heal them and release myself from the emotional prison I’ve lived in my whole life. For the first part of our life we don’t realise any of this, we simply act out these painful aspects of our past that were lodged into our subconscious. Sooner or later something happens to us to wake us up, become aware and heal the pain that’s…
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Finding your authentic blend of expression
Do you sometimes wonder who you are? I often catch myself thinking: “I want to know what my life purpose is!” Who am I? Why am I here? What am I here to do? I’m telling you it can quickly get very tiring and overwhelming. But still I wonder. You see, there’s this part of me that simply wishes to transcend the material. In other words, there’s this deep knowing that the material aspect of our life isn’t the full and whole picture. There’s so much more to our existence. And I just can’t put up with serving only to my material needs. Actually, I tent to ignore my physical…
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Accepting our shadow as a way back to wholeness
The key to joyful happy full life is the acceptance of all of yourself. It was C.G. Jung who first developed the concept of the “shadow” – we all have parts of ourselves that we would rather hide than show to ourselves or the world. These are those qualities we deem “unacceptable” due to many reasons – perhaps our parents told us that such and such people are bad, or to be this and this is wrong. Or it was our culture and community we grew up in that portrayed certain characteristics in a negative way. At a very early age, we learn to disassociate from these qualities in ourselves…
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The Rise of the Feminine and the next stage of my spiritual journey
Hello beautiful people at the new Vilina Christoph site! You can read my earlier announcement here. You might’ve noticed that I haven’t posted for the last couple of months. Truth is that this next stage of my spiritual journey has been brewing and hatching. In particular, I moved my blog over from the cosy and automated world of WordPress.com to an independents host which gives me more freedom. The move was ripe since I’ve been planning it for months and just last week it was the right time for that change. Your experience as a reader won’t change but if you’ve been following my journey you will notice some conceptual changes at…
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Memoir: Five
When my sister rang me on the morning of October 15, 2010, to tell me our mom had just passed away, I was just going out to work. It was Friday, our busiest day in the restaurant. I wish I would’ve stayed at home but I knew I had to show up for everyone else plus I wasn’t sure if I was able to stay by myself with the news. All the way down to work I was rationalising the traumatic event – “it’s better that she didn’t suffer long”, “she’s better there”, “her pain is over”. I couldn’t possible imagine what it meant for me – the death of my…
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Heal yourself, heal the world
Most of us know the popular quote: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” ~ Ghandi More and more we start realising that this really is the truth. On my journey of healing, more and more I start to understand that by healing myself, I make a change in the world, and the world itself heals. Digging deeper and deeper in my own pain and trauma has led me to realise that I’m not only healing my personal wounds. In fact, my wounds are wounds that many of us share; they’re wounds that have been passed from generation to generation, throughout the history of humankind. These are…
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Working with the moon, its energy and phases
It has been a few months since I started paying closer attention to the Moon and its phases. It is well known that the Moon has great effect on our planet and especially its water bodies. And since our human bodies are made mostly of water, it’s no wonder that our lives are influenced by its motions too. The two most known moon phases are Full Moon and New Moon, but we also have quarter moons in between. Overall, there are four main moon stages, each one of them lasting about a week. If you start following these cycles, you will soon find a recurrent pattern in your physical disposition, your…
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Self-doubt: get out of your head and into your heart
I often find myself lost and wandering. I question choices, I search for direction, I grasp for guidance. Since I was a child I was never able to develop a healthy sense of self-worth and confidence. I battle with doubt every time I need to make a decision or take action. This could be mentally taxing and emotionally exhausting. The struggle to stay on top and in control of things is real and relentless. If I say or do something, I doubt whether it was the right thing or if I didn’t rush it. If I don’t say or do anything, I’m wondering whether I’m being too passive or too…
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Acceptance: the path to change
“If you want to see change in your life, accept it as it is.” Lately, I find myself wanting yet another change in my life. I live in a city. About an year ago my family and I moved to Sofia, Bulgaria. It happens to be one of the most polluted capitals in Europe. I’ve started feeling the dust and the dirt of the city polluting my own life and state of mind. I find myself wanting to move again. I want to go far from the smog, the noise, the cruelty, and the trickery. Our family has suffered a few blows on our property, we’ve been stolen from, and…
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Interview with Elizabeth Johnsen: woman and mother on a path of healing and transformation
In 2015 Elizabeth contacted me through my blog – she was the very first person to reach out in such a way. Quickly we felt a much deeper connection which grew into a friendship. Even though we’ve never met in person I feel we’ve known each other for lifetimes. I know Elizabeth has been through some hard times recently and it was painful to witness her journey “from afar” but nevertheless, I never stopped feeling for her. I’m happy to see and say that she has overcome the darkness. Here are Elizabeth’s own words: Tell us a little bit about your life journey. I was raised in New Zealand by…
