Last night I picked a card from my Goddess Guidance oracle cards.
I picked Isis: Past Life
Your roots upon this planet are strong and deep, and some of the roots have anchored you in past memories from faraway times. These roots have anchored you so deeply, in fact, that you’re paralyzed when it comes to moving forward. I’ve called your attention to this condition so that you may unearth and uproot past memories. Some times you bury those memories to shield yourself from psychic pain or embarrassment, so you won’t remember those awkward moments when life tested you to the maximum. Reveal those lessons to yourself now, strong sorceress, and move forward with confidence that you have sage wisdom behind you.
Now that’s powerful, isn’t it?
I knew there was something for me to be revealed and know. Months ago I was speculating on my past life experiences based on intuition and dreams. A couple of weeks ago I dug a little deeper in my early years as a young child and saw situations much clearer.
Now this card was drawing even more attention to some part of me long forgotten and hidden in the corners of my psyche.
But I do know that something is still pulling me back, something holding me prisoner of my own fear and shame.
Some of the meanings of this card are: Get a past-life regression to gain insights and answers; Ancient fears from a past life are surfacing right now; You’ve known the person you’re inquiring about in a past life; Your current situation relates to a childhood issue.
I wasn’t inquiring about a specific person but more about what’s ahead of me.
An update for all of you: The time has come to move out of our house. In January this year the owner of the house passed away and in May the house went on the market to be sold. Two months later a young couple bought it and now my family and I are in our last week here. For the last two weeks we have been packing and now the house is almost empty.
The more exciting bit is that we decided to travel for a few months before we settle down anywhere. From Ireland, where we live now, we’re heading towards Bulgaria, my home country. If you don’t know your geographics – this means we’ll cross Europe from one of its most north-western parts to one of its most south-eastern parts. We’re going to visit as many countries as possible on the way to and back.
This process of moving out is the actual physical uprooting. I know that once we set off, I’ll be challenged in all sorts of ways. For the last 4 years I lived a very quiet, almost isolated, life. I haven’t travelled, I haven’t met much people, I’ve been a silent observer of life.
Now this is going to change and as much as I long for a shift, I know I’ll struggle finding my feet on the ground again.
Isn’t that what Isis was just bringing up? That sometimes I’m like paralysed when it comes to moving forward. And that doesn’t just mean a physical actual move, does it?
I have been working a lot on what’s holding me back and I’m getting clearer and clearer. Perhaps I will get a past-life regression – I’ve always wanted to.
But I also sort of did my own session last night…
After I picked the card, I also read some astrology to gather the current picture. Right now we have some very strong Scorpionic and Plutonian influences. Pluto is, by the way, the ruler of Scorpio. So we have a double whammy, but a gentle one since the aspect between the Sun in Scorpio and Pluto in Capricorn is a harmonious sextile.
These planetary influences are asking us to still ourselves and look into the deep waters of our psyches. What do we see there? What lies hidden on the bottom? If you’re still and ask questions, you’ll get answers straight away. I also had Isis by my side last night and she didn’t save me any details.
I had numerous visions and ideas about myself and how I have treated myself as a woman, how I have treated my body, how I have denied my femininity, how I have kept love off. Not knowing how to receive, how to experience and how to be love.
I was going through all my relationships with men and saw very clearly how with time I wasn’t able to progress a relationship and ending up either disappointed or not able to ask for what I truly want from the relationship. It seems that I stall at some point and the relationships digress and then fall apart. Every time the same pattern.
The visions then went deeper and became too vulnerable to share in a post.
Then I had this breakthrough, that my body is sacred, that it is a gift to me, that I love my body and myself so much. That there isn’t anything to be ashamed of, that being a woman is an extraordinary experience. That, we women, have the power and strength to bring forward a life, every woman has this innate ability within her, and we are the scared vessels that birth and nurture life. And our wombs is where these strength and power are kept, our wombs connect us to the stream and flow of universal energy, and if we can connect to this powerful energy, we will flow through life with ease, grace and love.
I kept repeating how much love I have for myself and that I release anything that has kept me away from accessing this love. It was transformational.
I am moving forward in my life uprooted and unearthed, with trust and love, eager to experience innocence again.
I hope this inspires you too on your journey of self-discovery. <3